Rachael
“I have been on a journey of discovery learning about who I am”
I trained as a nurse and worked in various nursing roles in the NHS for decades. I loved a lot of the jobs I had, even though there were parts of them that were less enjoyable than others! I had always known since I was a little girl I would be a nurse, without having much concept of what that meant. I loved connecting with patients and staff the best, and working out how I could help. I realised that facilitation was something that ‘lit me up’. As a student and staff nurse that was mainly about facilitation back to wellness, or for those at the end of life helping people to have a dignified death. As I became a Ward Sister and Senior nurse at whatever level, the patients remained the focus, staff too were a focus. Looking back I can see how pastoral care crept in to what I did. I care about humans (and other than humans for that matter) and as I take stock I can see how this has shaped my life, what I do and how I show up in the world.
I was very fortunate in working in the NHS, it meant I met so many people, from all walks of life, a number of whom I remain close friends with. Genuine, caring individuals. Ultimate professionals as well as great good fun to be around.
Not long before the ‘silver jubilee’ of my starting my training I was knocked absolutely sideways by a physical condition that meant I was unable to work, or do much more than exist for 15 months. Prior to that I had been fit and well and I was shocked to be so debilitated by an illness that normally people recovered from in about 6 weeks. For those 15 months I was mainly in bed managing symptoms that were totally debilitating, some of which I still have now. I was determined to get back to work and to ‘pay back’ the ‘debt’ I felt I owed the NHS for the sick pay I had had while eligible. I felt I owed it to the NHS for showing faith in me as well as to the tax payers for paying the sick pay I had been entitled to.
I managed to get back to work and after a year returned to my previous job (which I loved!) but events changed and I started to feel out of step with some of the changes that were happening. I recognise the changing nature of working in a big organisation. It helped me to understand that my primary driver wasn’t money or a ‘title’ but to be making a difference for patients and staff. In my 30th year of working in the NHS I became very unwell and at the start of 2019 I had what could be termed a breakdown. That, coupled with managing the symptoms of my, by then, long term condition was an implosion that led to me losing my job and being ill health retired.
Wallop! My job had become my identity, without it I felt lost and like I had no idea who I would look for if I was going to try to find myself.
I began my journey of discovery, to uncover who I am. I have had my fair share of ‘dark night’s of the soul’ as well as revelations landing like Divine gifts since I started this journey in ernest.
Underpinning my journey has been the learnings about holding space for myself and others which is a thread through all I do. I found I was open to other ways of healing. I became a Weleda advisor back in 2018 and have so much to thank Weleda for. I quickly transformed my attitude from someone wedded to the concept that Western Medicine was the way to ‘fix’ people, to being a person who now reaches for homeopathic and anthroposophical remedies and self Reiki treatment as my first option for myself! Rather than ‘fixing’ people or situations I search for the wisdom within myself and facilitate others to access their inner wisdom. It’s still about returning to wellness and I have opened up to seeing things more holistically, seeing things from different perspectives now.
I have become more in touch with my inner wisdom and less bothered about how it looks to anyone else. I was curious about Reiki prior to the breakdown, or as Brené Brown would call it, my Breakthrough. I sought out my, now Reiki Master, to give me Reiki when I was unable to leave my home. Whatever it was that happened during those treatments I felt it was working. So much so that I went on the learn Reiki Levels 1 and 2 for myself. This unlocked both a resource for myself as well as one that I can be bring to others.
The first Coach training I did was to become a Subconscious Transformation Facilitator. At the time I was in the midst of a severe depression and yet I turned up to the teaching and practiced the techniques. It cracked open the door to me of the possibility that patterns, thoughts and behaviours that I felt were ‘me’ could be transmuted. I continue to meet friends I met during that training on a weekly basis who are a gift to me.
My true alignment is with the power of Holding Sacred Space. I gift myself that holding space first and have apprenticed over years with Joey Walters, learning how to hold space for individuals, groups, in Circles and for situations, Developing this practice has been transformational for me and it underpins my daily life, sessions I hold with others of whatever form they take and even in my interactions with complete strangers. I have become kinder to myself and feel more balanced in relationship with others as a result. I feel deeply resourced by nature and by living in alignment with the energy of The Wheel of the Year. The natural rhythm and gentleness is something that I have fostered. In turn my self-compassion and self-love have been growing. I have benefited by learning all sorts of nature connection wisdom from Nicola and Jason Smalley.
If by now, you hadn’t clocked it, I love learning new things. Training from Rev. Jo Royale and from Neil Madigan about Meditation has been another piece of my own internal resourcing jigsaw. I have practiced meditation daily for years, which along with practicing gratitude I believe has nurtured my soul and transformed my experience of life.
As I began unlocking more feelings and emotions I came into the world of The Joy Movement, led by Dr Sarah Madigan. I then felt called to join Spectacular School. It was (and is) a coach training course for those who want to train as a coach and have a business. I didn’t want a business and was already trained as a coach! That meant I didn’t join Spectacular school for a year and when I did, I joined entirely for myself. It turned out that I reconnected with the joy of coaching. It turned out to be a glorious by product of following my intuition! Like space holding, Coaching is a total honour as well as a complete joy. The ‘Cosmic salary’ I get from coaching means I feel incredibly wealthy indeed.
In 2025 I trained as a Breathwork Facilitator. I had encountered Tom Granger and slow, rhythmic breath as a rapid way for me to feel more balanced. I followed a nudge to train as facilitator. I absolutely loved geeking out on the science of how it works, and what felt like a gift at the end of the training became a Certified Licensee of Aria Breath. This is a great resource for myself and one I love sharing with others.
On a Kundalini Yoga retreat I felt a nudge to do NIA white belt training in 2025. It is an entry point to teaching NIA, which I don’t feel called to do at present. It’s brilliant to feel the difference of knowing there are things I can do and that just because I can, doesn’t mean I ‘should’ or have to! NIA taught me new somatic skills and a greater body-centred awareness. This unlocked another route to my own body’s wisdom and another way of processing my emotions, this time through the movement of my body.
I’ve opened up to play, creativity, crafting and flowing with life. This feels like a brilliant balance for the work I do holding the depth of emotions I held at first for myself and then grew the capacity to hold for others.
I remain a committed Weleda Wellbeing Advisor. The ethics of the company, the efficacy of natural and organic products feel as aligned as when I was first introduced.
I feel very connected to the little girl who ‘knew’ she’d be a nurse. Not in an articulate way, she was certain of it nonetheless. I have tapped back in to this way of ‘knowing’ things. I still love learning more about how the body works and have enjoyed expanding from there to the connection with body, mind and spirit.
Learning to be resourced and connected. 